Learning from acting: How others perceive us

Most of us, when preparing for a situation in which we want to have power, we’ll start by focusing on what we want to say. But those who typically have the greatest influence over others are those who know that people aren’t listening to us as carefully as we may think.

Showing up to an interaction requires considering how others perceive us, as this influences the status and power they grant us. It also involves being mindful of subtle changes in our body language, which can impact how we present ourselves in situations with others.

Actors use body language to gain or give away power. Being authoritative is called playing high status (creating psychological distance), while being approachable is called playing low status (reducing psychological distance). Both are powerful techniques.

Actors are keen observers of human behavior and use their bodies to show up authentically in different contexts. As workplace leaders, we can learn valuable lessons from theatre. Below, I will share some of these lessons, highlighting those (*) with the greatest impact in business.

To “play high” in theatre, an actor:

1. Keeps their head still.*

2. Speaks in complete sentences; short is better, but with a clear start and end.

3. Holds eye contact while talking, slightly longer than normal when addressing someone. One caveat – in a high-status role, holding eye contact longer when addressing shows power. But when being addressed by lower ranking person, the high-status person looks away. There is an asymmetry to how you use your gaze.*

4. Moves smoothly and occupies maximum space.

5. Leans back and slows down.

6. Uses great, sweeping gestures. Lets their space flow into others. When playing high, they not only control time but they control space. They decide where the physical boundaries are.*

7. To control time, actors speak slowly. Sentences come out when they’re ready to complete them. Speaking quickly signals they don’t feel entitled to take up time.*

8. Never checks others’ eyes for reaction to what they said.

9. Looks down, by tilting their head back a bit. This is a very powerful adjustment – lift your chin a little, and you’ll notice you’re looking down your nose. When coaching an actor to deliver with gravitas, the director will physically lift their chin.*

10. Open their body. Opening and relaxing your body it allows you to have a clear pathway from your diaphragm to your throat and mouth. When fully relaxed, your voice can come from a lower place.

In summary, remember, your goal is to maintain a commanding presence and exude confidence through body language.